Odds and Sods

Arsenal 2- Birmingham 2 Eduardo’s injury - a horrific broken leg - stole the headlines.   But, it did not decisively affect the outcome.  Luck controlled much of it.  Birmingham capitalized upon one free kick - a questionable call - and one penalty - a blatantly wrong call.  Fabregas had two goal-worthy efforts, one stopped by Taylor and the other by the post.

Adebayor’s performance was as shocking as  his short hair.  He fluffed an open breakaway.  He also failed to square a ball to testy teammate Nicklas Bendtner.  Both would likely have clinched victory for Arsenal.

Walcott’s effort encourages, however.  His talent is elite without question, but his confidence and decision-making ability has been sub-par.  However, he put in a fine effort for a brace, his first two goals in the Premier League.  He adeptly slotted in the first goal, and his second, a few minutes later, was magnificent.

The draw drops Arsenal to three points above Manchester United.  The Gunners will hope their bad weak was a blip, not a sign of weakness.

Newcastle 1 - Manchester United 5  In case anyone was unaware, Rooney and Ronaldo are pretty good.  It was an exhaustingly easy effort from the Red Devils.  Newcastle played in a cloud, with neither coherence nor discipline in tactics.  The back four could not fall apart, because it never came together initially.  Even the one Titus Bramble’s part-time competence would have been preferred.

Newcastle’s question is not how long before Keegan gets canned, but how long before he suffers a nervous breakdown and quits.  They reside only six points clear of relegation, with eleven matches remaining.

Liverpool 3 - Middlesbrough 2 Individual brilliance once again saved Liverpool, as Torres took control with a marvelous hat-trick.  Carragher’s cards cost the team at the back, but exonerates none for the poor performance.  Southgate’s side showed themselves excellently.  With some luck and a consistent striker, that club could be challenging for a European place.

It was night of black armbands and barren kits in Manchester, which only served to emphasize the sponsorship everywhere else as Man City shocked Man United 2-1 at Old Trafford.  It is no coincidence that most of Man U’s losses come without Wayne Rooney on the pitch.  Ronaldo can score goals but even he with the fleetest of foot needs space to exploit, which only Rooney appears capable of providing.

Neither of City’s goals was very impressive, coming more from good luck and poor defending.  United supporters obviously reflected the solemn occasion by “saluting” Benjani after he put through the second on his debut.

Carrick came through with a fine goal at the end, which, though meaningless, proved a point.  His goal was no stroke of magic but rather pedestrian, a product of practical opportunism rather than a hair-raising blitz from the back.  Carrick is not as flashy as Hargreaves, but that’s not a weakness for a holding midfielder.  Carrick may not pose as much of a threat going forward, but his conservatism keeps things tight at the back.  Were it not for the 2006 World Cup, would Carrick be starting in his stead?

The United loss opened the way for Arsenal to take a five point lead in the Premier League, with their 2-0 defeat of Blackburn.  The victory for Arsenal proved important, but hardly impressive.  Despite dictating play for much of the game, Arsenal failed to create chances for much of the game, and largely failed to capitalize upon the chances that they did have.

They still have no genuine threat on the wings, which Wenger acknowledged by fielding four central midfielders (Hleb, Fabregas, Gilberto, and Flamini.)  The approach limits their angle of attack on goal and affords teams the opportunity to defend less of the field.  To get any pressure whatsoever on the wings, Wenger’s gents rely on overlapping fullbacks to create any width, leaving the defense vulnerable.  Against Blackburn, who cares?  However, that strategy may be exposed if they try it against A.C. Milan.

Elsewhere, Aston Villa throttled Newcastle 4-1.  Toon supporters, you’re gonna need a bigger boat.  The extended decrepitude of Keegan’s tenure has dried up the market for “exciting football” and “soccer circus” jokes.  Newcastle are just terrible.  With Keegan’s 2 pts since taking over the club, they are now a mere six points from the drop zone.  If Michael Owen scores in an empty championship ground, does Fabio Capello hear it?

If it is possible to have an unflattering hat trick, John Carew accomplished it.

Here is all you need to know about Liverpool 0 - Chelsea 0.  I fell asleep during the highlights.  The only thing productive that happened was that it killed Chelsea’s title hopes, 8 pts behind with two teams to overcome and it increased the probability of Liverpool being knocked out of the Champions League places.

Newcastle buzzed with electricity. The entire town pitched in, stealing Burger King hats and spray painting them black and white. The Geordie Messiah took the pitch to a rockstar’s welcome. Mike Ashley ordered a whopper, but he didn’t have it his way as Newcastle drew Bolton 0-0 at St. James park. Bolton looked toothless and the Barcodes looked tactless. Keegan’s presence seemed to engender their massive FA Cup victory over Stoke. Newcastle will have to hope the man can be as inspiring as the idea.

Reading lost 2-0 to Manchester United. Coppell’s men held the line for as long as possible, but Rooney and Ronaldo nearly always devastate at the end. Tabloid Wayne had a nice goal, and young Cristiano through one in at the end as well, which caused Sir Alex to forego his normal goal celebration to “salute” what appeared to be some fans. The only thing more perfect than Ronaldo’s play this season has been his hair, which miraculously holds in whatever absurd shape he manipulates it to without moving.

Birmingham lost a close one to Chelsea 1-0. Chelsea were vibrant in their fetching and fashionable highlighter yellow kits. Their play? Not so much… “Captain” Michael Ballack led Chelsea onto the field, and the team followed his lead as far as effort was concerned. Pizarro salvaged this one for Chelsea from a set-piece. Chelsea, astoundingly, have been playing a brand of football even more boring than under Mourinho, at least with him as manager he could provide some entertainment.

Arsenal dismantled Fulham 3-0 at Craven Cottage. The English would say that Fulham were pants. Americans would say that Fulham got pantsed. Arsenal didn’t play particularly brilliantly, but still cruised to victory. The 3-0 score could and should have been far greater. Adebayor can make a case for striker of the season in the Premier League. The midfield looked reinvigorated with the presence of Rosicky. He gets wide, covers ground, has great chemistry with Clichy, and is just an overall nuisance for the opposition.

Manchester United star Wayne Rooney will, apparently, be releasing a fragrance next year.  The idea came form his girlfriend Colleen McLaughlin who is currently releasing a fragrance entitled “Colleen X.”

No word yet on the composition of the fragrance.  Our best guess at Odds and Sods is a pungent mixture of sweat, body odor, and beer with a slight hint of Scouse.