Odds and Sods

Chelsea are apparently willing to negotiate Didier Drogba’s exit to AC Milan or Barcelona, but provided they get Kaka or Messi as “equal” value in return.  When does that deal go through?  When winged feral pigs fly out of Roman Abramovich’s ass and start shitting marshmallows.  And yes, Peter Kenyon would somehow spin that as the next great commercial frontier.

Mike Ashley will let Keegan’s Soccer Circus begin with an ample transfer kitty to spend on new talent.  Keegan will look at Wayne Bridge, Shaun Wright-Phillips, Scott Brown, Wes Brown, and Deco.  Keegan also may be in the market for Jermaine Defoe, though Aston Villa may be hot on his trail.

Lyon striker Fred has rejected Daniel Levy’s skeevy advances and elected to stay at the club, despite being out of favor at the moment.

And finally, lovable Teddy Bear Lassana Diarra has already tactfully announced his intention to leave Portsmouth should a big club come in for him.